Last evening, I had a dinner gathering with my ex-school mates. This meet up was quite impromptu and I am glad that most of them managed to turn up amidst their busy schedule. I always enjoy catching up with this group of pals – it is one of my longest-standing and timeless friendships that I have and am thankful for! Even though we have not met for the longest time, we can just “connect” and pick up from the last when we stopped!
As my this group of friends are already happily settled down, majority of our conversation went around our marriage life, family life etc.
This girlfriend of mine was sharing with us that her hubby used to tell her off when she was always using her phone to chat her friends on their dates. When she said that, I can relate to her immediately!!
Well, I remembered that during my initial courtship period with Ed, I am someone who is quite ‘attached’ to my communication tool! On and off, I will pick up my phone and check for new message, chats etc. It became more of a unconscious habit than necessity that I have to respond immediately. (One thing for sure, I believe it is just not me and my girlfriend who is gulity of that – check out the below stats from Lookout)
Ed had actually observed this ‘habit’ of mine and he would subtly hint that maybe I should catch up with that friend soon as it seems that we have so much to chat about! Of course I did get the hint and would reluctantly put the phone down. I have since realized that I have neglected his presence and it’s definitely not a good feeling when your loved ones did not give you the deserved undivided attention!
Now that I make a conscious effort not to be so ‘attached’ to my phone anymore, I have also since learned a little trick that you guys can try out too. Perhaps this little change can make a difference in your relationship? The tip here is whenever you have a message or chat that requires prompt response, what you can do is to share with your loved ones what is going on, let your loved ones know who message you and why he/she message you etc.
Though you may feel that this little gesture seem quite insignificant, but it does make a difference in the relationship. It would actually let your loved ones feel more involved and at the same time, it would also justify why you can’t give him/her the undivided attention yet, right? 😉
On my end, I do feel that Ed is appreciative of my little gesture and it makes him feel good that I do care about his feelings. Most importantly, we have much more substantial and quality time together!
As the evening wore on, it’s time for us to call it a day. As we settled the bill, I realized that most of my friends are looking at their phones and I exclaimed:
“ Hey, you guys are so impolite!!”
… and all of us burst out laughing.
Have a great evening everyone! 🙂