Communiation Pitfalls – Do Avoid!

Hey guys,

As many of you would have know for now that a good communication is the main building block of a lasting relationship but did it occur to you that in the midst of communicating to our loved ones, we might be taking them for granted and might have unintentionally “speak” in an undesirable manner.

< For the benefits of all our dear readers, we have listed down some common communication pitfalls for your reading. If it sounds familiar to you, please do something about it !

1. Criticism
We are not referring to constructive criticism/feedback, but rather an attack on the other party’s personality. Criticisms of this sort can really hurt the other person and damage the relationship if you are not careful.
Basically, diagnosing the other’s person’s personality defects is a poor attitude to have. Nobody likes to keep hearing how “unreasonable, overbearing, boring etc” they are!

2. Defensiveness
In an argument, it is inevitable that all of us would jump into a ‘defensive’ mode’, sentence like “I did it only because you reacted that way!” or “It’s not my fault!” would come out. However, this shows to the other party that you have closed yourself up and are not willing to listen to anything else.

If we can take a step back and react less strongly, that makes the equation slightly simple ya?

3. Contempt
When one party thinks he/she is more superior than the other (more intelligent / neater / more capable etc), this would have an impact on the communication. Partners who think they are superior tend to behave in a condescending way and they may even make decisions on behalf of the other person without consulting him/her. Because they feel they are much more superior, they believe that they can make better decision!

So anyone who acts like this, be careful! It’s likely your partner will be unable to stand it one day and simply leave you.

4. Stonewalling
When one begins to withdraw themselves and ‘switch’out, this is a dangerous zone to be in! Such person may feel that by “switching out”, this would avoid confrontations from the partner and may seem very obliged to ‘placate’his/her partner. However as time goes by, the underlying conflicts may get even bigger and leads to irreconcilable differences, which may utimately leads to a break up.

To summarise, all relationships experience conflict but there are better ways of communicating and dealing with the situation. So when you find a partner, or are already in a relationship, remember these 4 pitfalls to avoid.

Good luck on your way to building a successful relationship!

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About Ed Jen

Ed and Jen, the authors of, is a lovely couple managing their own Professional Dating Consultancy and sharing their thoughts on finding the *Sparkles* in Dating, Relationships & Lifestyles as well as Quick Tips on getting your ♥~Perfect Match~♥ on their Blog. Please feel free to connect with us at Google+
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